My Darling Yama
by Jade Starr
Summary: Matt's head felt like it was exploding as he squinted attempting to focus all the light that was streaming into the room. He touched his soft blonde locks only to feel moisture. He looked at his hands to see crimson coating his fingers. Rating will go up
1. Shots Fired Day One

**DISCLAIMER:**** I don't own them...if I did I would do terrible things to them... but I'll stop there I don't want to give too much away!**

**WARNING: **** This is Yoai love and will have some boy on boy mentionings and lots of gay love..if you don't like it SUCK IT AND LEAVE!!**

**Rated M for Language and maybe some boy on boy. (.) **

Matt's head felt like it was exploding as he squinted attempting to focus all the light that was streaming into the room. He touched his soft blonde locks only to feel moisture. He looked at his hands to see crimson coating his fingers. He tried to sit up, feeling oddly cold and increasingly dizzy, panicking as the he spun, the little room swimming in his eyes as he reached out to grab the something to catch him as he felt himself falling, slipping into the blackness that threatened to envelop him.

Footsteps scurried from his room and disappeared down the stairs of his complex and he knew he was alone. Alone and wounded. He thought for sure he was going to die there as he lay bleeding on his floor. Tears filled his crystal blue eyes as he thought of Tai, their sleep over last night where he fell asleep in his arms safe and warm. It was so cold. He was chilled to the bone. Where was his Tai. He didn't want to die without saying goodbye to his best friend, his lover.

All of a sudden out of no where he felt someone grip him firmly, holding on to him, protecting him and he felt warm as he closed his eyes to quiet the churning in his stomach that accompanied the dizzy feeling. He heard his name being yelled, muffled in a panicked voice coming from above him. He opened his eyes and through the mist of the morning light, he saw an angel before closing his eyes and letting the darkness take over.

Taichi Yagami paced the floor waiting for news from the Doctor on news about Yamato. Tears fell freely from his cocoa colored eyes as he walked the corridor next to his room for the 52nd time in a half hour wringing his hands impatiently. His sister Hikari was curled up like a kitten sleeping on Matt's little brother Takeru, or TK as the digidestined grew up calling him, as he watched her through crystal blue eyes that mirrored his brother's with a tear stained smile, obviously grateful for her presence and Tai wondered if he would ever get to hold Matt again, the way TK was holding his sister. Guilt racked his face as he punched the wall nearest to him, angry and defeated.

'_if I had just stayed with him today instead of going to that soccer meet none of this would have happened... he wouldn't be...'_ a groan of pain, not from the throbbing in his hand, he was oblivious to that, but from the sorrow and grief that had filled his soul, weighing him down. A soft hand fell on his shoulder and he turned to face the Honey colored eyes that stared at him with concern.

"Tai you can't blame yourself. There was no way you knew that an over zealous fanatic was going to break into his apartment and try to hurt him. It's better that you weren't there. If you had been you might have been hurt too. At least you were safe and able to save him and bring him to the hospital in time.." Sora reasoned with the goggle-headed leader as he stared at his sneakers. If he hadn't left his cleats under Matt's bed he would have never gone back and found him. It was lucky, but he couldn't help thinking...

'_If I hadn't left at all maybe I would have been able to fight whoever it was. I mean they had a gun but I could have fought them and maybe they would have shot me instead of my poor Yama.' _ Tai's head raced as all these thoughts swam in his head but he just nodded to Sora, not wanting to worry her any more than she already was. Her relationship with Matt had been short lived in Middle School but their friendship had flourished from that, Sora's easy going personality simply accepting he was gay and taking him in as another girlfriend...the only person happier was Mimi, declaring now she had a new shopping buddy, Sora more interested in Soccer than shopping. So now in High School they were all just as close as the had been in the digital world and Tai coming out had been just as easy, his friends simply accepting him. After all he hadn't changed at all, still loving sports and hating sappy movies, the only thing that had changed was... he'd fallen in love with his best friend...who happened to be a guy.

Even his parents, though upset that they would never get a grandchild from him, told him they had seen the way he used to look at Matt and could tell from the age of 11 that he and Matt were meant to be. Tai had just hugged them both and told them not to worry, Kari and TK would give them more than enough grand babies when they were older. Everyone laughed but Kari and TK who just blushed furiously.

Tai sighed as the memories flooded his mind, sobbing again he fell to the ground. Sora simply sat next to him and took his hand as they sat there and waited...it was all they could do.

The clicking of heels came running down the hall way at an alarmingly high speed. Tai who had dozed off looked at his clock wondering how long they had been there. An hour and a Half. He wondered what was taking the doctors so long? The sound got closer and Tai knew exactly who it was without looking up.

"hey Meems, thanks for coming" Tai said to the pair of hot pink heels that stood in front of him. He looked up and smiled gratefully. the Digidestined came together no matter what and apparently she had been on a date, taking in the tight pink sundress that hugged her swimsuit model figure perfectly and the matching pink clutch.

"don't be silly. it's Matt. He's like a sister to me" Mimi joked hoping to get a smile from Tai. When all he could muster was a half hearted chuckle, Mimi's face became very somber.

"Yamato is more than a friend. He is Family. We are all Family. As soon as I got the text, Joe and I left the restaurant immediately, we would have been here sooner but we stopped to pick up Izz." Mimi said in a soothing but determined voice. "Matt will be fine. He just needs us here for him. and we will be."

Tai stood up on shaky feet and hugged her, staring her Eye to Eye, the heels helping make it easy.

"Thank you. you have no Idea how glad We both are to have you guys as friends." he sobbed as he hugged her affectionately.

"It's no problem, any of us here would stop what we doing in a heartbeat for aonther digidestined. The younger ones have been notified and Dai's parents are bringing them shortly, and Joe is parking the car. He and izzy should be here..." before she could finish her sentence her cell phone rang.

"Sorry" Mimi replied sheepishly as she anwered her glittery pink cell. "Emergency still...no they still haven't said anything that I know of, they're keeping us in the dark... only his parents they're in there now...Okay...okay... yeah 3rd floor. Love you too...see you in 5" shutting the phone Mimi turned to inform the others. "That was Joe. He'll be here in 5 minutes. He is doing his pre-med here so he's gonna talk to his mentor the chairman of the Hospital and see if we can be informed every hour on the hour even though we're not family" she informed.

Tai sighed. "Thank you guys so much. If only I could go see him. If I could tell I love him, I could fix this, make him wake up..." Tai choked on a sob as He Mimi and Sora hugged each other, Takeru watching from his seat with Kari still curled on his lap, greatful his brother had such good friends and such a caring boyfriend.

Joe and Izzy walked up to the others, Mimi pulling Joe and Izzy into the hug, and they stood like that for what felt like hours and just prayed.

The Chairman had pulled through and although no one but family was allowed to see him the digidestined were informed every hour on their friend's condition and TK, being Matt's brother was allowed in every half hour for 10 minutes to see him.

"The hole in Ishida Yamato's head was caused by a bullet grazing his temple. while it missed his head he lost a severe amount of blood, being so close to his main artery and he will probably be comatose until he is stabilized. We're moving him from Emergency to ICU tomorrow.Then you can see him. I would suggest going home and getting some sleep for school, and coming to visit him after" the doctor informed. They all thanked him for his assistance but they all knew that they weren't going anywhere until their friend came home safe with them. The school notified by the police of the incident and having already received notes from all the parents (some authentic some forged...) excused them from classes, except Joe who was older than the rest and in pre med, which was fine with him, allowing him to keep a closer eye on his childhood friend and fellow digidestined.

Each ot them taking turns to go home and shower and sleep and get a change of clothes and pickingk up any missed assignments only to return back to the hospital.

Except Tai. Kari made sure she bought him clothes and him mother bringing a Tupperware of food for him and all of his homework each time she dropped Kari off.

"I understand you're worried but you need to eat and do your homework Tai. I'm letting you and Kari miss school but I dont want you to fail. And Matt wouldn't want you to on his behalf either. You need to keep your strength up for him." his mom rationalized. As much as she loved and worried about her babies, she had finally come to terms with accepting that they were 16 and 18 respectively, and both wise beyond their years, and she had to let them make their own decisions. The most she could do now was help where she was needed. He belonged to Ishida Yamato now.

Sora returned from her break, wearing a pair of capris and a white tanktop with a giant yellow sunflower on it.Yama loved sunflowers. He smiled knowingly at her as she put her duffel bag down, smiling smally at him. She pulled out a bag from her duffel bag. It said Spencer's gifts on it. She removed a book from the bag and walked over to Tai, offering it to him.It was a notebook,black with the two symbols for Male ingraved in the cover with the Kanji for Love under it.

"I figured you could write letters to Matt in it, and read it to him while he's in ICU, then when he comes to he can read everything for himself and see how loved he really is." Sora looked up at him causing Tai to realize how much taller he was. It seemed like it had been just this summer that Sora towered over him during soccer and Matt used to poke his baby fat...but that had been four years ago, and now Sora was a beautiful lady, Joe was a future doctor, his baby sister had a serious boyfriend that everyone was sure she would marry, not that they didn't say that when she was 8..., Mimi was a knockout and Matt, Matt was a rockstar. And the light of his life.

'_Please God, don't take my light away' _Tai silently begged as he accepted the gift from Sora and embraced her.

Tai sat in the emergency room as they moved Yamato to ICU. His heart broke as he saw Matt on the gurney, pale from loss of blood, his eyes shut and his cheeks lifeless, a mask strapped to his face helping him breath. A bandage holding a heavy pack of gauze to his head covered his pale blonde hair, Even his hair looked lifeless, pale and matted with blood in some places, sharply contrasting the soft golden locks that never seemed to be out of place.

Tai pulled out his notebook Sora had given him and the ridiculous pink sparkly pen he'd gotten from Mimi and began to write.

My Darling Yama,

I fear for your life. I know you'll be okay, somehow you always manage to pull through, but I'm still scared. You look so lifeless and helpless, I feel like I've failed you. I'm your leader, your best friend, and your lover. I'm supposed to protect you and I've failed. I hope you can forgive me when you wake up. I need you so much. I've never been so scared and alone before. I've been here since yesterday waiting for you to open your eyes. Please open your eyes Yama. I need you. I'm lost without you.

Forever yours,

Chi.

The other chapters won't be nearly this long, and some might just be a letter entry, whatever strikes my fancy. Hopefully I can breathe life into a dying Fandom.

Love you all, to all the authors out there that updated, thank you.

To any fans that liked it, harass me to update, I forget, but I'm gonna try to do better with this one.

Sorry if there are typos I'm on notepad which means no spell check... (YIKES)

well read and review I'll start working on the next chapter!


	2. Let It Slide Day 2

The pen quivered in Tai's hand, his other hand wrapped around Matt's pale dainty white hand gently enough to not hurt him but tight enough that his small hand couldn't escape Tai's much larger tan hand. His other hand was wired with monitors and IVs. It broke Tai's heart to look at them.

He wrote:

My Darling Yama,

It's 1:35pm, normally time for history class, our only time to see each other in school, outside of lunch. but you're still.....asleep

Tai sighed and set the pen down, wondering where to start. This was his Yama, he was a best friend, a digidestined, a partner, a co-leader, a lover...this was his other half. He ran his fingers over Matt's absent-mindedly, gently caressing the soft white hand, marked with dark purple bruises from the IV that hadn't taken.

'His fingers are tough though' he mused to himself. All those hours practicing the guitar Tai had gotten him as their first Christmas back from the digital world in peace. He had just turned 13, and worked hours cleaning animal cages at a pet store and washing dishes at two part-time jobs over summer vacation to get it for him.

Tai smiled reminiscing their first Christmas together. All the DigiDestined had done a draw to get a present for someone else, because it was hard to shop for 8 other kids! Tai had drawn Matt, and somehow TK and Kari had managed to draw each other.

He had spent an hour trying to wrap the guitar. Finally after seeing the monstrosity of different colored wrapping paper and string and six poorly homemade ribbons Kari had taken pity on him and wrapped it for him. It looked so much better when she was done. It was neatly wrapped with one very grand bow.

He and Kari stood at the door to the Ishida residence, both feeling ackward anxiety as the wrung the bell and waited patiently. A small crash some scuttling and a few loud shrieks later the door opened by a frantic looking Matt and a very nosy four covered TK. Kari giggled at the site and Tai just chuckled as he tried to casually lean against the door, forgetting the carefully wrapped guitar he was hiding behind his legs. Before Matt could invite them in the guitar slipped from behind him almost falling on the floor. He caught it but lost his balance in the process, landing on his face. Tai blushed slightly and then laughed at the worried and bewildered looks on all of the collected faces around him. dusting himself off he picked up the guitar, and handed it to Matt. Matt blushed, his pale cheeks turning a pretty shade of rose. Kari and TK also blushed as they presented the gifts. As they turned to walk in Kari looked up and saw that mistletoe was hung up over the doorway. Brushing by TK, she pecked him on the lip, blushing a deep crimson as she giggled and ran in to where the other digidestined were sitting, save for Mimi and Sora who were in the kitchen trying to help Matt's very confused father make a Christmas Dinner. TK quickly turned and chased after her, still holding his cheek.

Matt chuckled following the younger two, gift still in hand, he ushered Tai into the apartment he currently shared with his father. Tai had meant to kiss him on the cheek, just to be cute. It was all in fun. He hadn't expected Matt to turn right as he grabbed his wrist to kiss him on the cheek. He hadn't expected Matt to have his mouth half open in a thank you for the present still wrapped in his hand. I guess even in accident it still counted as their first kiss, although the two still argued to date which kiss was the first "real" kiss...

This thought jarred Tai from the memory that seemed to be sucking him in. He felt water splash his hands and the notebook, smudging the D into a spidery black blotch on the paper. He picked up the pen again, taking a deep breath and began writing, instead telling Matt about what how he was occupying his time.

My Darling Yama,

It's 1:35pm, normally time for history class, our only time to see each other in school, outside of lunch. but you're still.....asleep.

I just finished all of today's homework that Kari dropped off YESTERDAY. Luckily Joe was here early this morning before class to check on you and was able to help me with my math. God math SUCKS. He spoke to the attending doctor and explained our relationship and they are allowing me to stay here in your room with you until 9pm every day. I should go home to sleep but I pretty much just live here.

Kari brings me clothes and my homework after school when she comes with the others, and I just take a shower in your bathroom before I get kicked out. Sounds pretty crazy, using a hospital bathroom instead of just going home...but I just can't be in that room after....everything. I do my homework in the lobby and then take a nap, one of the nurses, Yao, who works the night shift is really nice she always brings me a blanket and a pillow.

She's 22 and a huge fan of your band, she asks how you're doing even though she's not your nurse every night! Then mom drops off breakfast and picks up my work and gives me my homework to do during the day...with you.

I just hate leaving you alone. I feel like if I hadn't left you alone to go to practice, this wouldn't have happened. If it hadn't been for me you would still be here, awake, sitting in history class, flicking me in the ear each time I fell asleep, or writing a new song in your notebook while you pretend to be reading. You wouldn't be here...asleep. I am so sorry Yamato...please forgive me.

Love,  
Forever Yours,  
Taichi

Tai bit his bottom lip, holding tears back as he put the pen down and closed the book. His stomach grumbling with dismay and hunger as he looked at his watch. 2:35 Kari and the others would be there shortly and he still hadn't even gotten lunch yet. He kissed Matt's head gingerly after setting the notebook down on the chair with the pen.

As Tai reached for the handle to the door it turned startling him. A young man with shocking violet eyes behind thin black wire glasses and glossy violet black hair bumped into him as he read the clipboard in hand intently.

"Oh I'm sorry I'm his RN for the day, please call me Kuro" the young man greeted him holding out a gloved hand. Tai shook his hand firmly, making the young man cringe. Tai blushed slightly and stepped to the side to move out of the nurse's way.

As Tai walked out of the door the male nursed called out to him gently. "I'm sorry about your boyfriend. The nurse whom I relieved explained the circumstances to me."

Tai thanked him as made his way out of the room. Hurrying to get out of the nurse's way and to hurry up and get his food before the nurse left so Matt wouldn't be left alone for long. He checked his watch 2:47 the older kids were already out of class and probably just getting ready to pick up the younger kids from middle school. Davis and Ken were going to take off of practice but Tai had insisted they didn't, it was bad enough he was Team Captain and had missed 2 practices already due to this, as had TK with basketball. The coach however had been Tai's coach for a long time, and had always told Tai if he ever needed to talk he was there for him. While the team might have had their suspicions, just like Matt's bandmasters, both them and the coach never asked any questions. Tai was pretty sure the coach knew, but had made it very clear that teasing and hazing was not permitted on the team.

Tai quickly grabbed a sandwich, a huge piece of cake, a glass of sweet tea from the cafeteria after waiting in a decent sized line and made his way back to Matt's room, scarfing his sandwich in the elevator. He checked his watch as he took a sip of his tea and then proceeded spit take when he realized it was 3:15 already. How had it taken him almost a half hour to get his food?!?!? He was about to sprint from the elevator as soon as it opened but stopped when he heard Joe's voice.

"No" "No no no no nooooo NO NO!!!"

It was quickly followed by protests, TK insisting the costumes were foolproof and Mimi trying to sweet-talk him with Sora and Kari interjecting from behind. He was almost tempted to close the elevator and pretend he didn't know them...he couldn't risk getting banned from the hospital and not being allowed to see Matt. It would kill him, but his curiosity got the best of him and he couldn't turn his back on his team, no matter how nutty they can be at times.

He turned the corner to see Augumon running at him full force in a trench coat, a pair of pink goulashes, matching hat, clutch and gloves. This HAD to be Mimi's doing. From behind him he could see Gabumon in a matching outfit in blue, with a large handlebar mustache pleading with Joe. Before Tai could look to see if any of the other digimon he was knocked down by a very worried Augumon.

"Easy buddy" Tai murmured holding his childhood friend. As much as it worried him having the Digimon in the hospital he was glad to see him again.

"I like the outfit...Mimi" Tai joked, smiling at his old friend.

"Yeah, Gabu insisted on coming so we figured I should come with him, since TK and Kari said it would be too hard to sneak all of us in here." he chirped.

"Yeah I'm not too surprised Gabumon wanted to come visit but I'm not sure if this will work" Tai told him as he took his hand and walked back to others. He knew he was fighting a losing battle. Keeping Gabumon out would be like keeping him from seeing Matt or Kari if they were in the hospital. Gatomon had alerted the other digimon the day it happened, and from the way Kari said Gatomon spoke when she saw Tai, everyone in digital world was in as much as in a panic as they were in the human world.

They joined the others and Tai bent down and hugged Gabumon, wishing him a Happy belated Birthday. Normally Matt would go to the Digital World for the entire day and spend it with Gabumon.

Taking his hand he turned and walked with him to Matt's door while Joe continued to argue with the others about how much trouble he -THEY ALL- could get in if they got caught, especially with all the Teenage Wolves fans outside and media trucks. Gabumon explained how someone had alerted the media as they entered the room and what a circus it was becoming outside. Luckily the hospital had allowed them to use the ER entrance that the police had kept clear. He stopped short when he saw Matt, tears and snot running down his face as he saw his partner in bed bandaged and bruised, wires and tubes sticking out. He sat there for as long as Tai would allow him and talked to Matt, about all the good changes in the Digital World, the new fur that Augumon got him for his birthday, and of course how much everyone missed them.

Tai looked at his watch when Augumon came to the door. 5:00pm. Tai's watch went off. He greeted the plump woman who briskly walked into the room clipboard under her arm, Her unintentional peachfuzz glaring at them from atop a giggling jowl. Tai like clock work, got out of her way, brisking Gabumon out the door, remembering Joe's warning about staying out of the nurses' and doctors' way to be allowed to stay. He tugged Gabumon behind him, walking out to where the others were waiting, each taking turns to go see Matt once TK and his mother were done. He could hear them all talking about first kisses while they waited in the lobby. Mimi admitting although she'd had several boyfriends before moving back to Japan, she hadn't kissed anyone before Joe, and they've been together ever since he worked up the courage to ask. TK and Kari's was in 8th grade, after the final school dance, and Sora's was Matt at a spin the bottle game at an after-show party freshman year. Tai stopped, sitting with Agumon in the back of the waiting room, his thoughts flooding back to that first Christmas.

It shocked him to core as his lips met with Matt's half parted lips, a blush deep and crimson to rival TK's. Tai was so shocked the only thing he could think about was how soft Matt's lips felt. It was only a few seconds, maybe a minute at most, but it felt like an eternity to Tai and he felt his eyes closing slowly like he was being sucked into Matt's blue eyes and getting lost in his case. A yelp from Matt's father in the kitchen and then laughter from the girls jarred them apart, as if the electricity had been too high when they pulled apart, shocking them both.

They both walked inside as everyone lounged talking casually or setting tables. Matt immediately set his unopened present under the tree with the other unopened "secret" santa presents,busied himself setting the table with TK and Kari, who looked to busy laughing and joking to notice his blush...he hoped, while Tai went to go help the girls in the kitchen. They had spoke during supper, but avoided eye contact with each other, raising suspision from the others, but it was soon lost with pie and the opening of their presents.

Kari had gotten TK a hat, Him a camera, Mimi got a hot pink purse from Sora, and then Matt opened his... Tai grinned ear to ear as Matt picked it up tuning it.

"I figured you could use an upgrade from your Harmonica" Tai said with a chuckle. Before he had had a chance to blink Matt pounced on him, pulling him into a big hug. Tai quickly flipped him over, having gained some new muscles over the summer with soccer practice and TWO jobs. pinning him down. Again before had a chance to react Matt shoved him off, laughed and ran back to the guitar, opening up the booklet. Tai played it off and laughed as he opened Joe's present. An encyclopedia on soccer. Only Joe could find a way to suck the fun out his second favorite thing in the world. He glanced up while skimming through to see if it at least had some kind of pictures, only to find Matt staring at him. Luckily for once Tai was glad their mom was the first one to pick them up. He was almost certain Matt would never speak to him, but when he got home, an email waited in his inbox.

Tai,  
Thanks for the guitar! I loved it, I've already made my fingers bleed! Come over tomorrow, we can pig out on left-overs and go through all the lame things we got this christmas, like socks, or spicecake, and all the cool shit. I don't think anyone is going to top this gift though :) You really are my best friend, Tai. See you tomorrow.

Matt

'Matt was ignoring it', Tai realized. If that wasn't a fluke, if it wasn't just him being "confused" Matt didn't want to know. And Tai curtainly wasn't going to risk losing his best friend, and even though he dreamed about it, he never once brought it up, and both boys let it slide...For now.

Tai snapped out of fog once again, this time to Kari putting a hand on his forhead. Shrugging her off, tai just told he was thinking about Matt, and she let it go, knowing not to push with her big brother.

"Everyone had made there rounds and has to leave, it's 7pm" Kari notifyed him. He nodded, still somewhat lost and Kari just sighed and hugged him. It was like someone had removed half his soul. In a way they had.

Tai snuck back in the room at 7:30pm after saying all of his goodbyes and collecting his homework, food and clothes. After a almost 2 hours, Peachfuzz Peggy, as Dai, or Davis, dubbed her came in and told him it was time to clear out. He checked his watch. 9:30pm. He hadn't heard his watch go off.

'DAMN' he swore to himself. He'd wanted to be out before she got there. He tried to make sure he was a discreet as possible. He gently squeezed Matt's hand. Not nowing if the unsightly orderly would reprimand him if he kissed him, and left for his spot in the waiting room. A plate of cookies and a carton of cafeteria milk waited on the coffee table. a pillow and a blanket from Yuo lay waiting for him. he checked his watch. 9:45, he'd missed her for this shift. He pulled out a paper from his notebook and wrote her a thank you. He eyed the cookies hungrily, as he kicked off his slippers and set up his blankets and books for the rest of the night. Before he got a chance to finish reading his first chapter of history, he fell asleep uneaten cookie still in hand. Dreams of Yamato still in his head.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
Finally I updated! It took a year but I started watching the series and I had to finish. I lost internet today so I decided to be productive and write this. Working on the next Chapter already, hopefully I get good reviews!

Let me know what you think. It will have shorter posts, funnier posts, and some sick, whoa creepy kinds of posts. I have a few good ideas to keep this moving. Just don't let me lose steam! lol then I get ADHD'd away!


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